April 16, 2010

I've been so blah lately.
Nothing feels real anymore.
My memory seems to be slipping. Weird things are happening.
I seem to be eating oddly fast. I'll have a plate of food, and as soon as I start eating, it's gone and I don't remember eating it. I've been looking for a job for months and I'm just not qualified for anything. I'm wasting away, spending all of my time playing those fucking facebook games. Since I don't know what to do anymore, I'm just trying to keep myself amused. I've realized that I truly have trouble talking to people these days. It's so rare that I can have an actual conversation, that it's hard for me to think of what to say. I'm slowing down and going backwards, when I need to be doing the opposite. I hate so much of how I live, yet lack the motivation to improve it.